Wingham first-time author shares personal story of grief to help children
Deborah Dickson lost her mother 50 years ago, and it still hurts.
"I had just turned 19, and I had three brothers, nine, 11 and 17. And she became ill and died within three weeks. So it was very tragic. Back in that generation, you didn't talk about your feelings. You were told to hide them," she said.
A friend recently encouraged Dickson, a first-time author, to share her journey of grief in the form of a children's book about the loss of a loved one.
With the help of her artistic grandson, Dickson put together Always Kiss Me Goodnight, her very personal story of losing her mother during Dickson's formative years.
"Not having my mom for 50 years, I missed out on a lot. She didn't see me get married. She didn't see me have children. We have six grandchildren. Maybe she's watching me from above. So you've had to improvise through your life with that loss, and you need to do that. There's no other option," said Dickson, who grew up near Listowel but now lives in Wingham.
While she's not a therapist or social worker herself, she's spent a lifetime working with children and always felt there weren't enough resources for children in the wake of a loved one's death. And certainly not personal stories from a local, small town perspective.
First time author, Deborah Dickson of Wingham discusses her new children's book, Always Kiss Me Goodnight, to Saugeen Hospice volunteer and retired nurse Edythe Oberle on July 30, 2024. (Scott Miller/CTV News London)
"Living in a rural community, there were no resources to our knowledge. And as I said, you didn't talk about it. You just did the funeral. You carried on as if nothing had happened. I don't want children to feel alone or afraid when they lose someone, and especially if it's tragic, especially if it was a parent. You're so engulfed in sadness and fear, you sometimes will retract," said Dickson.
Just published in May, Dickson said Always Kiss Me Goodnight is already being used by local social workers, mental health experts, and palliative care professionals to help children deal with loss.
The Saugeen Hospice, which is currently fundraising to build a six-bed end of life care residential hospice in Walkerton, will not only use it in their new facility, but will be sharing it with local students as soon as possible to bring the topic of grief out in the open.
First time author, Deborah Dickson of Wingham discusses her new children's book, Always Kiss Me Goodnight, to Saugeen Hospice volunteer and retired nurse Edythe Oberle on July 30, 2024. (Scott Miller/CTV News London)
"Hospice will be getting Deb's books and putting them in the schools. All children need to be allowed and given permission to grieve, and this book helps them in their journey," said Saugeen Hospice volunteer and retired registered nurse Edythe Oberle.
Dickson wants to get her book into every hospice, school, and library across North America to help families with the difficult conversations her family never really got around to having.
"For me to feel that I can maybe help kids not struggle as much as what I did," said Dickson.
You can learn more about Dickson and Always Kiss Me Goodnight and about the Saugeen Hospice by following these links.
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